Friday, 1 October 2010

Insomnia

I am one cursed soul. I don't know what I have done to anger the Gods, what sins I have committed, but they are definitely super pissed at me.

I suffered from Insomnia when I was studying BE somewhere around 4-5 sems. And people usually make it sound cool because you are still all funny and cheerful in the day and the guy doesn't even sleep? Trust me..it ain't that cool.

Then I suffered again a few weeks towards the end of BE. The sick thing was that the first time I suffered, nobody at home or around believed me. One fine day, around 3 AM when a neighbour had problems and they came out to ask me for help, called out in a very low tone and I sprang out and opened the door. They believed me now! Oh yeah! Why would a guy lie about insomnia? I just don't get it. Well, nobody ever really believe the things that go on with me. For example, people at my work place wont believe I have a habit of writing. (I refuse to name the blog - which helps their case). New people I get to know don't believe I used to talk a lot..its a long list.

Anyway, after the holidays started in the June of 2009, I used to sleep 10-12 hours a day. Most people thought I was making up for all the lost sleep.

When I didn't suffer from insomnia, the Gods ensured I got no sleep with numerous well orchestrated plans. First you all know about the attack of the street lights? I wrote about it. Then the attack of Akon, thanks to my roommate who carefully placed his computer speakers next to my pillow and played it all night as he studied each and every single fucking day, with the lights on. I wrote about that also.

I came out of that PG, rented a house, got rid of that room mate, occupied an entire bedroom for myself (Call me selfish, I just want my sleep). Now apart from the fact that I sleep on the floor, and there are a bunch of Tamilians who seem to laugh like little girls till 1AM for no apparent reason, I did manage to get some sleep, until last month.

The Insomnia is back!

The tossing and the turning. The uncontrollable drowsiness. The headache. I can't take it no more. You know what the worst part is about insomnia? You gotta come up with something to think for the entire 8-10 hours you are tossing and turning on your bed. That usually doesn't happen and so you are left with thinking about all the useless trash in the world.

"How would it be if my eyes were blue?" (I can already think of a comment coming up on this - 'Thuu..you would look uglier')

"My manager, he is such an asshole. Maybe I could follow him on the way home and smash a stone on his head when he turns into a dark alley"

Then I rub my eyes for a while. Turn right..adjust my knees or hands or whatever, throw the rug around, turn the pillow over.

"Maybe I should rob a bank. THEN I could buy that DVD writer for the laptop"

"I think I will make a good robber" And now my Imaginarium starts creaking into action. 'Ladies and gentlemen, this will only take a minute. Put your belongings into this bag, and you behind the counter, push that button and Ill blow your head off, you sir Ill take that iphone also, you madam, you got a nice rack...' that's when the robbery scene turns into something else, but lets not talk about that now. I'm sure you people know by now I have got a pretty good imagination.

Anyway, that doesn't really help, cause you really wanna start counting sheep (which doesn't work if I do either) but the moment you start counting, the sheeps turn into anything.. Dirt Bikes, Bottles of..err...mazaa, Pamela Andersons..

This goes on till dawn when I can hear people start to wake up, some start sweeping, others start weeping. And now I am really cursing myself for losing so much time and pull the blanket over the head trying to get the last few minutes of sleep.

That's when I usually get some sleep..a long series of 20 second sleep intervals..I think. Probably what's kept me alive.

I have cut down the intake of coffee, hoping that it is what is causing the insomnia, not working. A tablet of citrizine has always helped me get some sound sleep. But I wouldn't resort to pills. Any other ideas?

7 comments:

Kavya said...

Hmmm thats bad. Don't take tablets. There should be some way to fall asleep. try and explore all possible ways! :D

djd said...

Iam also a constant Insomnia patient.
Its usually due to anxiety or stress.
Try relaxing yourself may be some yoga.If you havent watched Fight club do watch it!
"With Insomnia nothings real everything is far away,everything is a copy of a copy of a copy"

Anonymous said...

I am doing research for my university thesis, thanks for your great points, now I am acting on a sudden impulse.

- Laura

anusha said...

Try reading a boring book. Or listening to some soothing music. Pick up an exercise if you have the time for it-maybe you're just not tired enough at the end of the day to get sound sleep.

v! said...

cough syrup! ;)

or try yoga.. it really helps!

Iceman said...

@all Been there..done that

So there is no solution!

Rashmi said...

I second you here, been there done that all.... :(
Please help if you find something else...
thanks
Cheers!