Friday, 18 November 2011

An alien ate my homework

"I don't even know what that means!"

Right! 


"I would. I want to. But I can't, because my cousins also follow it and I don't want them to know that I do too."

Whaaaaat?


"You know you are awesome. A person should not need some external entity to provide solace to the question of whether anybody likes what you have to say or write on an open expression platform. Besides, you are a cynic. Your beliefs and idealogies are hardly motivated by the opinions of other people, I know this for a fact, so why does it matter?"

So that's a No then?




"I was about to, but just when I typed the first letter a trojan that had infected my computer acted up and the whole system was frozen for all eternity so I couldn't, there was smoke and everything, I was so scared. They had to give me an injection to calm me down. Sorry.."

I am now thinking of taking up drinking Charlie Sheen style. And without water.


"Hey I did..I seriously did, I even took a picture of it on my phone as proof, but someone stole my phone."

I wish I had a gun.



These are some of the replies that have succeeded a typical conversation like this:

Person: Hey checked out your blog. It was awesome!
Iceman: Yeah? Thanks. Do leave comments when you read something you like.
Now, go read the post from the beginning.





While considering the amount of effort you guys are putting into coming up with these elaborate excuses, there are two things that come to my mind

1) I need to seriously stop asking people for comments. After all, my obsession is only with numbers and NOT a good hard ego-massaging..

2) Advice some of you to try writing screenplays for sci-fi movies.
    Cause people accept anything that happens in a sci-fi movie.


And the biggest wake up call is to completely disable comments on my posts (Which is how it was when I initially started writing), before someone comes up with something like this:


- I wanted to, but I write my comments on a sheet of paper first and check for spalling mishtakes and grammatical errers, yes, I always doing because me perfect always, and when i doing this, suddenly suddenly a crow coming and taking the sheet of paper from me and swallowing while sitting on the coconut tree.

12 comments:

anusha said...

Maybe they should make a " I read it, but i'm not gonna commenting" button. And probably have a "Explain why" column beneath that.

Iceman said...

The column should be a drop down and have some values populated, unless it wont work. For ex:

Explanation Choose one:
1)I'm super lazy.
2)I hate you.
3)I'm a lurker.
4)You are not really as good as they say you are.
5)I have only 1 finger.
6)You suck big time.
7)I don't have time to massage your ego.
8)Ahh someone else will do it anyway, why bother?
9)I have poor communication skills.
10)Ayyo..Shy is coming.

Mohan said...

Ha ha ...
Option 5 ... :P ...

anusha said...

The day might not be too far :P

Fellow Urdu Buff said...

Ouch.guilty as charged.and not proud of it.will drop a line henceforth.being a douche bag was more fun tho

Fellow Urdu Buff said...

Ouch.guilty as charged.and not proud of it.will drop a line henceforth.being a douche bag was more fun tho

Iceman said...

Aap ki iss jawaab ka ham arson se be-sabri-se intezaar kar rahe the. Lagta hain, aaj kayanat ek ho gayi :P

meghana shetty said...

frankly speaking this BLOG surely left me laughing my stomach out .. n i blame u to render me falling out of my seat for this ;P .. !!

GOOD 1 !!

Iceman said...

@Meghana
Welcome to the insanity :)

DeEpAK KaRtHiK (420) said...

LOL:P
like for the topic :)
http://www.deepakkarthikspeaks.blogspot.com/

Rohan said...

Deliver revised commandment for the lazy commentators on thine blog->

That if thou shalt not confess with thy mouth(fingers if thou mind) at holiest blog and shalt believe in thine heart that blogger has only raised the stuff from the world wide web, THOU SHALT BE DEALT.

Iceman said...

LOL!! :D