Saturday, 17 December 2011


I recently got "The timeline" (you have to say that like you would say "The death star" or "The Millennium Falcon").

The moment I realised I could get it before they decided to activate on their own will, I jumped at it and got it. Not that I was eagerly waiting for it, but because its one of the most irksome, 'destroy-your-private-life' kind of feature, especially for people like me, that facebook has released yet.

It's a feature where all your past posts, activites etc etc, can be easily surfed through in a brand new interface. Its basically a quicker archive.

I had to get it quickly because I wanted to know what sort of shit I had posted ages ago and what should definitely not be there for my detractors to see and what could land me in trouble with my company or relatives etc.

And I was surprised. There wasn't a single such thing. The most common feedback I ever got was that I was blunt, rude and the blah. And yet, there weren't a lot of posts I would have cared to delete. Though I did hide about 4 posts from my timeline, plainly because they were outright silly. Or maybe all our posts sound silly 2 years later. As a result of this, two years were blown straight out of the timeline.

I was even more surprised to see the scarcity of my posts. I don't think I found over 20 status messages over so many years. Glad to know that I ain't among the feed flooders.

Facebook has been known to make a mess of good things a little too often. After going through this new feature I must say I have to say its a work of art. Lemme explain why.

1) You are less likely to delete your account now, because it seems more like your memories are attached to it. Trust me, some of your own old posts might make you smile. Besides, I know some of you jobless folks. You have spent half your life on the site and your poor employers even paid you for it.

2) It makes it easy for the advertisers to collect info on you and target user specific ads.

3) Even though it will eventually be activated to everyone, some of you can do so right away. Absolutely genius move this. Why?
Facebook has learnt from its past mistakes. Everytime they made a change, they messed up. People hated it, protested and eventually just learnt to live with it than leave. This time, its voluntary. So even though this is by far the biggest privacy concern, nobody will realise it.
 - One person uses it.
 - Realises that his/her friends don't have it.
 - They brag about it. (And my dear cynics, this is not what I am doing.)
 - Their friends activate it.

And so the water trickles. The sheep jump into the pit on their own and facebook doesn't have to lift a finger.

All said and done:
There is one thing I do like in this new change though. And that is the "Cover". I loved it. I Chose something nice for mine and trust me I didn't break my head too long over it.

Lastly, the timeline made me realise one more thing. It has been the longest standing social network ever. According to my observation, the successful ones last for 3 years. People seem to simply migrate to something else after that. Myspace, on. FB has stuck on for 5 years. Wonder what will be the next big thing. I have high hopes on Diaspora. I had very discreetly mentioned in one of my posts --> "Forget IP addresses the world is running outta good names"

In India, ofcourse, the facebook boom happened around 2009 when suddenly people started flooding the network. I think I had 36 friends here till 2009. Now it stands at a little over 500. That's actually less, when compared to some of my "So nice to know you...hey! Are you on facebook?" kinda friends.

I have been considering closing my account for quite a while. The only reason I haven't is not the love of the site but the fact that all my friends are there and is the best way to stay in touch. However, I do love twitter. Its like an addiction. Sadly 95% of my friends don't seem to know about twitter. Its short and sweet, unlike me, yet.

(Disclaimer: This post doesn't endorse any site. Nor trash it.)

BTW, did you know that, if you delete your account, your photos are still retained. Wonder how on earth they could make money from that? Something tells me, I don't want to know the answer to that question.

Social-life-ka-boom warning system: Once you activate the timeline, you have 7 days before its published, so hurry up if you have skeletons in the closet ;)


  1. Dumb fucks !! lol ...

    Can't hate the timeline, though ... Its weird but simple ...

  2. I am happy that you decided not to close your FB account. I'd miss reading about what your up to or just checking to see that your alright, I miss you....

  3. Speaking of which, you had vanished for a while there..